In this third Agents of Absolutely Nothing part, I take the most mundane modern upgrade, village broadband, and let a whole community overreact to it in the funniest ways possible. A humming router in a slightly crooked flat above a shop becomes a suspected government listening post, a ghost‑hunting control room, and finally the centrepiece of an art exhibition about rumours, wi‑fi and village neurosis. If you enjoy small‑town fiction where the real drama is in the parish hall, the bus stop, and the bakery queue, this book is written exactly for you.

You will meet three reluctant “agents”, a rule‑obsessed civil servant, a chaotic artist, and a baffled American, who find themselves translating apps, cables, and council‑speak into something their neighbours can live with. Around them, Little Barrow blesses the router, forms a stakeout committee, starts a group chat called “Absolutely Nothing To Report,” and turns a faulty old television into a local legend. The tone is warm, witty, and intelligent comedy, with plenty of sharp dialogue.